The Pilgrimage of one Charismatic with a Seat-belt, part 3
Paradigm Shift
I think that is why I have turned to biblical-theological studies in terms of seminary education and vocational ministry. And that is also why for the last CC conference in 2007, I coordinated workshops instead and spoke at the Worship Ministry workshop. I still love singing, and also yearn to lead worship again sometime in the future and rightly at that! However, if there is anything that the past 3 years has taught me, it is that all true worship both begins and ends with His God and His Word. Before any music is involved, a correct understanding of who God is and what He has done must be unveiled before God’s people; and after all times of musical worship, this very understanding should bring substance to lives of brotherly love and godly obedience.
Biblical worship hence must be God-centered, Word-centered, and Christ-centered. The music used in authentic Christian worship should serve and support this three-fold focus of worship that is proclaimed by the lyrics, and further, it must never distract us from the Word but point continually us to it.
Convicted of Sin, Convinced of Grace
Therefore, I am convinced that corporate Worship Leaders must rightly show, and the congregation thus must rightly see, that unconfessed and unrepented sin makes us guilty before God, pollutes our innermost beings, and ultimately hinders our worship to God. Because of the guilt of our sins, we deserve God’s condemnation and punishment; because of the pollution of our sins, our hearts become morally corrupt in God’s sight. Through the Law and the Scriptures, we thus are convicted of our sins.
But thanks be to God — because by the saving work of Christ on the cross, we don’t get what we deserve! We are “justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, 25 whom God put forward as a propitiation by his blood, to be received by faith” (Romans 3:24-25). “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death” (Romans 8:1-2). But through the Cross and the Scriptures, we thus may be convinced of His grace!
This is the very thing that our worship, privately first and corporately second, must manifest and promote. It should entail a life that magnifies God in Christ Jesus — preaching the Gospel to ourselves daily, and reminding others to do the same; giving God an all-consuming response for His all-deserving revelation; loving Him with everything we got and loving our neighbors with all that we have left! Without this, our love is only a noisy gong and a clanging symbol (1 Cor. 13:1). But with this, our worship may be reverently loud — a soundtrack to holy Christ-glorifying lives where His name resounds and His praises ring out all over the world!
Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.
The Pilgrimage of one Charismatic with a Seat-belt, part 2
2005
Prior to graduating from college, I served three years in worship ministry for the inter-Chinese Christian Fellowships ministry conference, Campus Challenge, which is held annually in May in the Toronto area. I was Worship Coordinator for the 2005 and 2006 conference — leading on-stage for the 2005 conference, and directed/coordinated the 2006 conference worship team from “behind-the-scenes”.
Looking back, those years were the climax and denouement of my time in worship ministry. I really desired to lead the 2005 conference, because I wanted to take my worship leading to the “next level” and to do something “big” for God. In retrospect, I don’t think that is necessarily the right motive to have for serving in such a large event, even as humble of an ambition as it is. As theocentric and Christocentric as the 2005 conference worship music was, I think I served and led in order to benefit myself in terms of ministry experience. It’s not really a bad thing, but I think there was a self-centeredness on my part that nobody would have noticed — I wanted to “get” something from leading that first conference.
2006
The second Campus Challenge conference I lead (2006) was quite simply, in one word, memorable. A lot of good and yet a lot was learned from that conference. After 2005, I still wanted to be involved in organizing the conference and coordinating worship, but in a sense that was off-the-stage and more behind-the-scenes: leading the team in devotions, providing theological oversight, overseeing the technical audio/visual needs, and leading the congregation in some invocational prayers between sets.
That year, I strived to train up the next generation of worship leaders who would then take over on-stage the ministry, and also reminding the team that as musical as worship can be, there is a theological / doctrinal / Bible / Word -side to worship that music serves. I recall the emphasis of the devotionals I led the team was focused on the truth that God does not care about how good the music sounds if and when the life and the heart was not firstly right with Him and worshipful. Boy oh boy, did that ring true, for numerous musical mistakes happened, technical glitches occurred, and further, I failed to guide the team through those mishaps. And lets just say that much heated discussions ensued after the conference about why it all happened.
Lessons Learned
Numerous lessons were learned from that May 2006. If there was anything that directed me to step away from any and all musical worship leading or coordinating, it was probably the events of that conference. I learned a lot in retrospect about what I should have done when a worship band – for whatever Divinely foreordained reasons – fails musically more than subtlely and thus hinders corporate worship.
Most importantly, I was convinced of how the image of God in all of us is functionally marred & hampered and structurallydistorted & perverted by our sins: pride, arrogance, selfish ambition, covetousness, envy, anger, and sloth, to name a few. The source of sin within both unbelievers and Christians – even in those of us who are chosen by God to serve Him and lead His people in corporate worship – is in what Scripture calls “the heart”. The heart is the total person involved in the act of making decisions — either obedience to God’s Word which honors him, or sins of omission or commission which dishonor Him.
Whether it be playing the wrong note at the wrong time with the incorrect amount of strength, or saying something thing using the wrong words at an inappropriate appropriate time (Matt. 15:9), or not speaking words of guidance appropriately after a necessary circumstance (Luke 6:45), all this has its source in and involves the inner core of the person and the very center of his being. For sin has poisoned the very fountain of life, all of life is bound to be affected by it (Jer. 17:9).
The Futility of Music
Part of me lost faith significantly in worship music from that time forward, especially in terms of an area for vocational ministry. I simply got fed up with the vainglory that the human heart finds in today’s modern “worship” music — a hypocritical lip-service that many in our generation-x/y/z use to refrain from a holistic life of worship, that which firstly involves knowing God better. Those 30 minutes every Friday night or Sunday morning is inauthentic and futile when our 24/7 relationship to God and our brothers and sisters is not genuinely loving. Music in corporate Spirit-led worship is helpful in sanctifying our hearts through the lyrics, but it certainly does not save anybody, nor does it transform the heart or regenerate any person.
I may be speaking more about myself here, but I hope that me being vulnerable here would be an encouragement to y’all reading this: the passion we exude in our public worship of God (especially on-stage) must never be louder than our private worship alone. And further, our personal relationships with others must not be more passionate than our private relationship with God (Mark 12:30). Without a continually justified and sanctified heart, any “worship” we offer is thus in vain (Psalm 50:7-11; Psalm 51:17). We must preach the Gospel of Jesus Christ to ourselves daily in Word and in deed, and consequently, keeping a close watch of our life and doctrine (1 Timothy 4:16).
Part 3 of 3, concludes tomorrow…
The Pilgrimage of one Charismatic with a Seat-belt, part 1
The recent blog post from Bob Kauflin at Worship Matters shows us how a Charismatic with a seat-belt motivates the church to worship God! It reminds me why I myself benefited and learned so much from leading corporate worship in the past, something I currently do not do nor have any plans to continue to — for I’ve always had a deep desire to faithfully magnify the greatness of God in Jesus Christ through the power of the Holy Spirit by skillfully combining God’s Word with music, thereby motivating the gathered church to proclaim the gospel, to cherish God’s presence, and to live for God’s glory.
Back in the Day
I don’t have any formal musical training, and so when my English Ministry elder of my home church asked me back in 1996 to “lead worship” for our small 20 member English Sunday worship service, I simply accepted the invitation because I was brand new Christian and yearned to serve the Lord in whatever capacity available to me. From those early days in our new church building, cramped into a small Sunday School classroom, I lead worship for at least once a month for about 10 years. At the beginning of college, I began to teach Sunday School at church, and also concurrently led and coordinated the worship music ministry for my campus fellowship(Chinese Christian Fellowship) as the Worship Coordinator. During those years I picked up bass guitar by myself, mainly to spend less time “in the spotlight” and to make room for the younger generation to start learning to lead services.
Charismatic with a Set-belt
If you know me, I’m the kind of worship leader who says a little too much than “normal” worship leaders. I always sought ways to “spice things up”, whether it be through biblical written-out prayers with ample alliteration, dynamic invocations, powerful Scripture readings and passionate readings of Spoken Word pieces. In recent years as far as I can remember, I would always try to start the worship service with a slower, familiar call-to-worship type song (my fave to use for this opening slot was the classic “All in All“); people are usually kind of groggy and only half-awake at the beginning of the service (or late!) so this allowed everybody to get warmed up vocally to sing praises to God.
After that, I might pray an invocatory prayer and/or read a Psalm, and then jump right into a powerful, upbeat praise song. I might have a couple of those (possibly medlied), which then was followed by/lead into songs of a slower tempo — namely songs that reflected on the substitutionary death of Jesus Christ for our sins. I usually said a prayer of confession repentance before singing that song, while a soft guitar/piano intro plays, and I’d do my best to include Scripture that speaks of Jesus’ redeeming work on the Cross. (One of my faves here has been the less well-known song, “You Gave Your Only Son (Praise You)” by Martyn Layzell). If I didn’t stack that with another song about the cross, I often followed that by with a song focused more on our need and/or commitment to Christ (my faves here included “Rescue” by Jared Anderson and “What Else Can I Do” by Steve Fee)
With all the worship leading experience under my belt, I longed to take my ministry to the next level, and to further use my gifts for his church and people.
Part 2 of 3, continued tomorrow…
$6 CDs from Sovereign Grace Music
As announced by their Director of Worship Development, Bob Kauflin:
Sovereign Grace Ministries will be selling all their music CDs for $6 in February, with free shipping in the US! (For those outside the US, complain to Bob)
Preview their CDs at Sovereign Grace Music, and be ready to stock up in February at their online store.
